FREAKING BLADES, DUDE!

I am so flipping excited that I don't know what to do.

I got my blades in last night. I haven't skated in forever, but I want to get back out there. Mostly, because I have the opportunity now, and I just love it. I can't believe I allowed myself to be off the ice this long. It's part of my DNA. I am not joking.

SOOOOO, there is a rink right down the road from my work. I walked in today to ask when the freestyle sessions were. I got to talking to what I have surmised was the coaching or staff manager, and she offered me a job to teach little ones on Tuesday evening and on Saturday afternoon. I won't be paid, but I will get free ice time, and I am IN HEAVEN. I can go skate during lunch, and it will be dead.... meaning, that no one will more than likely be on the ice, but me... every skater's dream. Normally, ice time is 7 dollars every 30 minutes.

The man that will sharpen my blades is supposed to call me today, when he comes in. You can't let just anyone sharpen the type of blades that I have. There is a rocker that would get flattened in the wrong hands, and it would be dangerous for an uneven sharpening.

My hands are shaking. Adrenaline.

I'll be on the ice again, soon. I'll be able to take my girls.

I am working closer to coming full-circle. The fog of my depression gets lighter and lighter to reveal the most beautiful life. I am so grateful. I have been meaning to blog about my depression. I believe that I now, and will from now on, have the upper-hand. I was diagnosed a few years ago as clinically depressed. SURPRISE! that's quite hilarious... it's like "ok, finally... geez"... sometimes it just takes you to hit whatever bottom is for you. Thankfully, it was only emotional, and not physically destructive. Some people aren't so lucky... more about all of that later....

Since then, I have started to come out of the nasty depths of it all and live. It's baby steps, I tell you. Never would I have had the confidence to walk into that place and strike up a conversation with those two women that I chatted with today about skating. Some may say, "uh, yes you would... you talk to everyone".... well, that's the thing. I would have talked and it would have been over and I would have walked out with sharpened skates and that's it. I actually had the confidence to smile and ask questions and laugh.... wow, a genuine laugh is so taken for granted... and I walked out with an opportunity....

I am fired-up. Hopefully, it will work out, and I can take the girls and John skating. They can get to know that part of me. Even John has never seen me skate. I was good, but we'll see how it goes. If nothing else, it's calming.

I also need prayer, and I can't speak of why at the moment. I have been informed that someone I know is going through a horrible time right now, and it will most surely only get worse. So, please, pray for healing and love and life for those that I know and love.